TAMMY SILISIA DE'ATH

[TAMMY SILISIA DE'ATH]

TAMMY SILISIA DE'ATH!

••• square one

full name: Tammy Silisia De'Ath
birthdate:Eleven February
age: 26
blood: Pure
school graduated: Hogwarts
house graduated: Ravenclaw
occupation: Psychologist, Head of the Rebellion
children?: No
canon?: Yes

••• soul meets body

eyes: A blue green colour, that tends to vary according to mood or clothing.
hair:Blonde when Tammy, Black when Tanya
height: 5'3"
portrayed by: Nicole Kidman
in-depth appearance:

Tammy has a slight smile always lingering on her face and her real smile is a smile that one only sees four or five times in a life. It's a smile that sees a person for who they are and accepts them as they are. A smile that portrays the image of never ending patience. This all comes in useful considering she counsels people for a living. She never used to be like that. Her smile used to be ungenuine and secretive. This was before her outlook on life changed. She slowly grew into her understanding smile, helped along by a rocky life path. Her lips are full and a soft pink. Her teeth are straight, but that's only because of the miracle of magic. She used to have skew teeth that she justified as teeth with character. Her smile has a welcoming quality to it. Her smile drifts to a lost, dreamy one when she is not working as she tends to drift into her own world and her own thoughts.

She has a finely constructed face and a pale complexion. She has a certain ghostly quality about her and a definite feminine look about her. She has deft movements and is very reserved with them. She uses her hands to talk but doesn't over exaggerate her movements. Her hands are small and her fingers long. She sometime adorns them with rings of special meaning. Her favorite is a ruby and diamond one given to her by her grandmother. Her thin body is usually covered in over eccentric clothing. With this she acquires curious looks from passer bys. Her clothing mirrors her artistic temperament and she finds no shame in wearing things many other would not consider wearing. Her face is always lightly touch by make up although it is never over the top. It is usually concentrated to around her eyes and a touch of gloss on her lips. When she is in a bad mood, tired or upset she will not bother with making herself appear pretty and not apply any make up.

Her hair is naturally a blonde that falls in loosed, untamed curls about her face. However, she makes it turn black when she is portraying Tanya. She will tie it up loosely if it is bothering her but usually it is loose. It falls past her shoulders, around her waist. She occasionally straightens it but usually couldn't be bothered. Her laid back attitude comes through in the lack of actual effort to look the best she can. She will attempt to look acceptable but couldn't be bothered to look absolutely fantastic. She tends not to be out there to make herself acceptable for the world but rather for herself. She sashays when she walks when she's feeling confident but tends to drift when she's in deep thought about important issues.

Her eyes are very expressive when she wants them to be. People know exactly what she's feeling if she desires for them to know yet she can close them down to show nothing. She is very much in control of her facial expressions when she needs to be due to her acting experience. Her eyes move to more of a green when she's angry and a tranquil blue when she's calm and happy.

••• dreams are sacred

patronus:
amortentia:
The natural smell of oil paint and turpentine. The smell of new leather and horses. The smell of rain in the heat of midday. The smell of a perfume that isn't sweet or spicy. The scent of a rose that is just beginning to open. The pages of books. The smell of a fire in a warmly lit room.
boggart:
Tammy's worse fear is slipping back into the hell hole of depression. It was a path she had long walked and slowly grown to come into a real life. She fears slipping back into the half life that her darkness gave her because it was the worse thing she had to deal with, and she's dealt with a lot. The endless tunnel with no end haunts Tammy's thoughts when she looks back on her life wasted by the caging darkness. She tends to avoid talking about her depression, even know that she's been treated for it and is a counselor herself, for she does not even want to relive the time in her mind. She will carefully duck the questions with well asked diversions if anyone asks. She's also terrified of falling in love. The idea that someone would become close to her and she'd begin to talk about everything she has tried to hide all her life. Although she tries not to show her fears as she views them as her weaknesses, sometimes it comes through when she's talking to intuitive, nosy people. She tends to avoid people aimed to find out more about her because of this and stays mainly with her patients, as they are there to solve their problems.
mirror of erised:
Tammy dreams of a world without pain and although it is completely unreachable, she still strides towards the goal with unbelievable bravery. She would take on the whole world's pain if she could. She also secretly has the desire to get close to someone which she hasn't been able to do in a long time. The yearning for someone to get close to has grown since the only man she loved died. Although she desires this she has never really openly looked for love or acceptance among people but rather keeps to herself and dreams absently about it. She desires to find the lost path of her patients and goes about it with a concerned determination. She is determined to be completely happy, because her long struggle has left some residual pain that is mainly caused by loneliness. She desires to know she is loved and appreciated and eventually get a family of her own.
secrets:
Tammy has a secret darker side. She has dabbled in the dark arts but know one that knows her has any idea. She tends to keep her past a secret with the motto, “Now is the present, the past is history.” She doesn't believe she will ever find anyone to be close to even if that's what she tells everyone. She will also not tell anyone what her brother did to her.
likes:
Honest people
Freedom/ Independence
Animals
Solitary time
Poetry
Art
Her patients
Helping people in their lives and overcoming difficulties
dislikes:
Judgment on people
People that break other people down
Prejudice
Things that are out of place
People that don't care or are cruel
Pessimists
Depression
The Regime
in depth personality:
Tammy has a deep love and concern for her fellow humans and is at her happiest when she feels herself to be in the service of others. She is a supportive and self-sacrificing and a friend to all (Mainly because she hates conflict). She intuitively knows how to cheer or heal others who are in a crisis. She also has a swift, analytical mind, dexterity and a lot more faith and courage than is often demonstrated by the others. She is a empathetic and a kind person and skilled in the arts of diplomacy and leadership. (When she feels like it) However, she does not feel sympathy and struggles to think in emotional terms, keeping her ideas and support logical and very rational. She has an innate wisdom about what others need to survive and thrive. She manages to easily earn the devotion and respect of others and desires to become a pillar of her community.

She is so self-sacrificing she is also in danger of working herself to the point of exhaustion. One of her life path lessons she still needs to learn is to remember to care for her as much as she care for others. Another one of her life challenges is to make sure that she doesn't take on more than she can chew as this might force her to break promises that her would rather keep. She is a soft touch, so she is also at the risk of being taking advantage by individuals who might see her kindness as the mark of a fool. Tammy almost allows people to take advantage of her. The word no does not seem to exist in her dictionary and she obliges to most requests. Unfortunately, it makes her angry and crabby and loses her temper with the people that are not taking advantage of her. She tends to be a little passive aggressive that way. While she should be laying down her boundaries, she takes her anger out on the people around her. She can be very impatient if she's had a long day, or a rough week. However, her traditional approach to life along with its ethics and moral values usually serves her well.

She is far too centred around others, often leading her to neglect herself. She often finds herself worn out and depressed caught up in a state of self loathing after a long period of working or keeping busy. TLC for herself is a language she must learn. She cannot help people to her full capabilities until she finds the balance. She is terrified to show her anger so she bottles it up, causing herself a lot of damage.

Tammy is not the fit in the box kind of person. She is unusual, has unusual beliefs, and approaches to things. Out of a work context, her speech is sometimes hard to follow because she changes her ideas very quickly and muses to herself. She doesn't feel the need to make sense in ordinary conversations. She has not quite found the boundaries of work and play and tends to work more than socialise. She takes her school work very seriously. She is very caring and open to people's ideas and pain. She is one of those people that draw people close and allow them to talk easily without fear of being judged. She hates judgmental people and hypocritically, she is rather prejudice and closed minded towards them. This of course, escapes her knowledge because she refuses to believe that she is being hypocritical. It is a great blind spot of hers. To most people though, she has some understanding and most of the time has a great acceptance for who they are and why they do things the way they do. This comes through in her smile and gentle approach to people in need.

Tammy can be hard headed and stubborn and tends to be very flighty when it comes to people entering her personal life. She can be very short tempered when she's had a long day or if she's upset. When she's very angry, she tends to cry. She is a very calm person so she doesn't get angry quickly, but when she does, she completely looses it. She is trying to work on establishing her boundaries because she tends to be a bit too considerate and people get away with too much from her. This makes her very tired but sometimes that extra patience pays off. She isn't afraid to say what she thinks and can sometimes be considered tactless with people that get on her nerves.

She has a very dry sense of humour and loves making people laugh and feel better about themselves. She can be a bit over the top at times when she feels as if she needs to present herself to an 'audience' as such. Her and her speech patterns could be considered quite opulent and diplomatic when she puts in that effort. She uses her talent in the languages to manipulate people in the direction she wants them to go. She tries not to use this unless she considers it absolutely necessary. She is clever and tends to get a little irritated with people that are slower than she is or cannot follow her elaborate speech pattern. You won't find her anywhere near a club or anywhere with loud music. She is very cultural orientated and spends most of her time reading or painting in solitary. Her gatherings with friends are very civilized, although that is compromised by her eccentric behaviour.

She is very dedicated to what she does and will always go the extra mile not matter the circumstances. This sometimes leaves her in complete burnout but she considers it worth the price. Tammy is very arty and paints in her free time to relax herself and connect with who she really is. She allows her ideas to flow onto canvas with a very informal approach. She doesn't paint for the world but rather for herself and finds it very difficult to part with her paintings. She is emotionally attached very easily to things and develops passions for thing. Her concepts are usually hard to follow or require a lot of thought to understand but she is always happy to explain things deeper if one would just ask. She also enjoys writing poetry, reading, and comprehending it as well. She has slowly fallen into more of a balance but still leans to more intellectual and cultural rather than other spheres. The only social she would choose over learning is helping people in her work. Tammy isn't a what you see is what you get type of person and struggles with opening up to anyone. She will open up to those she has become attached to and her aspects of her personality are hidden to people and one has to look to see who she really is. Under stress she tends to internalize emotion rather than bring it out to the world.

Tammy often throws herself into things without thinking. She is governed by impulsive thought and her passions. This often leaves her in trouble but she is far too proud to ask for help when she gets herself into difficult situations. Tammy can easily be considered a paradox of a person. While she cares for other people, she does not want other people to care for her. She is very closed with people, and is not afraid to manipulating them into believing what she wants them to believe about her. She desperately hides behind the facade she puts up when people pry into her life. “The past is in the past –” A rather hypocritical life motto. She has a lot of growing to do as a person, far more than she's like to admit.



Why the Rebellion side of the war?
She is a free thinker and a string individualist. She hates being control and fights for all that is good and true. Her father had tried to control her and so she developed an acute hate for order.

••• a tale to remember

family:
William Edward De'Ath {Father}
Claire Elizibeth {Salzmann} De'Ath {Mother}
Chloe Rene De'Ath {Twin Sister}
Cassandra Victoria Salzmann {Grandmother}
criminal record:
She is the Regime's most wanted. I suppose that counts.
in depth history:
Tammy was born into a closed minded, cynical family that bordered on being almost medieval in their pureblood mania. They lived in Africa for the first years of her life, before her parents moved to Oxford, England. The household demanded that order was kept and her father was a very strong perfectionist and control freak and believed in the type of order Voldemort had once imposed. Her mother on the other hand was a paranoid, and rather irrational and over protective of her fortune but cared little for her children who were nothing less of status symbols. Tammy and her twin, although not identical, Chloe were surprises to the family, their youngest sibling being Raven, who was seventeen years older than they. Their father was proud. He believed that girls were more susceptible to him molding them into the ways of his family and the tradition of being in Slytherin. He made it clear that they'd be in Slytherin, or they'd be outcasts of the family. Chloe, the more docile of the twins was happy to accept this but Tammy, who was the opposite of her twin desired to know more, unhappy to believe that “mudbloods” and “muggles” were scum. She slowly tried to look beyond the walls of their family house that was the picture of class. Chloe was very much like her father and was sophisticated and worst of all, cruel. Tammy on the other hand believed there was more to life. This lead both her mother and her father to dote on Chloe more. Her father to encourage her thought pattern and to punish Tammy, and her mother in fear that she'd loose her fortune because she provided a free thinker and individualist to the family.

Tammy, in a desperate attempt for attention, drew away from her parents and sister, and drew closer to her older brothers. They were not a good influence on her and when it came down to things, they took advantage of her and her innocence and she became very callous and difficult at the age of ten. She began to feel as though her parents ignored her because she did something wrong. She slowly began to blame herself for the things that happened and became more withdrawn and gave up on having friends altogether. Instead she threw herself into art and memorising spells that she found in books in her father's library. She was determined to show her parents that she could in fact do well in something. She didn't understand why her parents loathed her. Her naivety did not allow her to see that her parents hated her for her compassion to all people, including the so called scum.

The real cause, was her brother. Raven lived with his parents still, with his bride. He had had three children by her, the first lot forcing him to marry her at the age of twenty one. She has originally just been a fling. She was a kind hearted woman, charmed by his deceit. He had two twin boys and a girl. The house was promised to Raven, him being the eldest so he was to remain there. Raven become the source of most of Tammy's anguish. She had openly admired, as a younger sister would, her brother, totally besotted with his charm. She was completely wrapped around his finger and any request of his would be obeyed. At first, Raven innocently used this against Tammy, requesting her to bring him his stuff or food and drink. Less than innocent things proceeded. Raven noticed his parents dislike for their daughter and preyed upon her isolation from those people who were supposed to protect her. He was also bored with his good natured wife, who doted upon her seven year old daughter and her nine year old twin boys. Little kisses followed, claiming it to be normal sibling behavior. She began to avoid her brother, unhappy with the way the relationship was going. Whenever they did come into contact and Tammy resisted his advances, she got pushed into walls or hit, often berated with abusive words too. She got her letter to Hogwarts at the age of eleven, as well as her sister. Her parents still dared to hope that somewhere, Tammy had the same cruel streak of a Slytherin. Lately, she had been showing it. Though, they didn't know the real cause of it.


When she got to Hogwarts she was sorted into Ravenclaw and her sister into Slytherin. Her brother was long out of Hogwarts so she needn't fear him. Her parents were not sure what to make of it. She was not the first in her family that had been sorted into Ravenclaw. Her father's sister had been one as well as his own mother. His sister had been a disgrace to the family name, while his mother had not been. At least, they resigned, their daughter had not been sorted into Slytherin. For a while she was completely happy with her life. She slowly began to make friends and looked to the brighter side of life. She was away from her parents, and best of all, she was away from Raven. She made loads of friends from most of the houses as her open, eccentric personality came out. She really started caring for people and by putting them first she became know as some one people could talk to about problems. Her parents heard of her escapades when she got home the next summer, having refused to come home during the holidays because of Raven. With great disgust, they sent her to go live with grandmother, who was other disgrace to the family name. Raven left her with words, “You'll always be mine.”

Her grandmother was ecstatic to receive Tammy, happy that family there was another family member of a good nature. She combated Emma's anger with empathy and slowly Tammy grew out of her shell. When she was fifteen she received a letter that her Grandmother had passed away. That was the start of her depression. She now really had no one that cared for her the way her grandmother had. She felt lost and began to struggle at school work. She became more aggressive and irritable. People quickly started to avoid her. She had become unpleasant to be around. She became disruptive and started bunking lessons. At this age she started experimenting in the dark arts as Slytherins had started to find her rather good fun to be around. She became adept at Fiendfyre and played with the unforgivable curses.

A professor noticed Tammy's strange behavior and took her under her wing. After long sessions of talks and tears Tammy moved back on track with her new mentor. She grew extremely close to her. She felt supported and when she left Hogwarts she graduated top of her year. She went on to study psychology to help other people like her. There she met a muggle, Caleb Vincent, to whom she fell in love with. They were together for five years then he died in a hit and run accident. After that, Tammy didn't dissolve into a madness but a very quiet grief. She distanced herself from other but still kept ties with the Professor. Now, at the age of twenty six she is in her first year of practice and enjoying helping people more than life itself. She never wants to descend into that madness again though. She has slowly come to understand the world and understand pain and it's only because of the pain that she has become the patient person she is now.

When the order began to rise, Tammy started growing uneasy. She watched them carefully and moved away to France. Keeping her ear to the ground and her eyes open, she tracked the progress of the Regime. Slowly she grew outraged at the growother people against the Regime in her travels back to London. Then the Aprile Kathrine Prince. From her, she found out that her twin was in the Regime. Together they formed the Rebellion and now stand in wait for the end to come.

••• famous last words

your name or alias: Sarah
how long have you been role playing: 2 years
contacts: Pm
how'd you find us: I made us
other characters: NA
keyword:EDITED
sample roleplay:

Dust rose from the collection pages that made up tattered book in Tammy's hand. The spine had multiple fold marks and in places small tears lay on the folds. Gentle hands opened the ancient book, taking care to not let the loose pages fall to the ground. Green eyes danced across the yellowed paper that were aged by the slow pass of time. She ran a finger over the delicate paper ready to fall apart at a rough, jerky touch. A tiny smile grew at her lips as one of the few things she actually loved lay in her hands but held no threat to her. Its knowledge brought power with it and calmed her deepest desires to be great. To be someone else that had everything they desired and were strong enough to keep it. All something she had never managed to do. A huge regret about something she could never go back and change.

She let a small sigh escape her lips as she looked up from the pages to room around her. She stood in the far corner. A place reserved for old unwanted books that hoped that one day somebody would hear them screaming out forgotten knowledge. The room was bustling with people that seem so disconnected with the world. That passed from day to day without thinking about what was happening, merely continuing life and the chore of living it. She smiled wryly. This is were you saw people's true nature. In long queues where life becomes hard and makes a person impatient. Most people hate queues. Not her. The glimpses of humanity that waited there created a sense of knowing the world. If you want to see a person's real nature, stand in the way of them paying for the things. They aren't that good, deep down, they don't really care about the eyes that watch them or the people they talk to. It's all just a set of lines on a stage they create for themselves.

They're all actors on strings to their desires and self made gods, totally controlled by them. Looking at them stands as a reminder that they're not so different then who she is. They all have their own secrets to keep and masks to hold on to. If one thing Tammy knew about, it was acting on this stage of life. Books were just a way of making it easier. Making it somewhat bearable to watch the days run without her. Yet all of this life around her was valued, even if she would rather stay away from it all and be herself in the enclosed darkness that surrounds her mind. Did it all even matter? This thing that people put themselves through. Smiles danced across faces in the room. People argued, some rejoiced. It was all so unique to this day yet all the same. As usual, she was on the outside looking in. Some things never change but she wouldn't have it any other way.

Her mind wandered slightly, it all seemed so pointless. To be watching the world and forgetting about the life that must be lived by her hands. It seemed as if she is merely a passenger in her life. A bystander watching the traffic pass and waiting for a bus that will never arrive if it wasn't look for. Somehow she never saw herself boarding the bus of her own life by merely paint a picture of it and cling to created illusion instead of the real thing.

She looked back down to the book it her hands, it held memory to the people that wrote it and the times they lived in. The only time they would ever get as now is the only time she would get. They the best of it. Of all the dark times and the times of laughter and happiness. What did she do? Lie in the shadows and sulk but carry on smiling at the world around her. She ran her fingers through her fiery hair that held but the last strand of her vibrancy for life. She closed the book gently and ran her fingers over the place where a title should touch the book. All there was, was old black leather with one fleck of gold. All the mumbles of the world around her were blocked out as her interest in watching them faded.
"No title, no identity," she muttered to herself. Just like me.